Wednesday, April 30, 2008

what if no one were fat?

yet another headline that caught my attention...
In the United States today, 66% of adults are overweight. Almost 33% of adults are obese, and 4.7% are morbidly obese, or more than 100 pounds overweight. But . . .

We'd save billions of dollars in gas. Airlines would double their profits. A dearth of diabetes and other diseases would save billions of dollars more -- and put thousands of doctors on the street. McDonald's would sell not Big Macs but little steamed chicken snacks -- or watch its profits melt away. Productivity would rise, potentially creating tens of thousands more jobs or higher wages all around.
Add up the savings on health, food, clothing and efficiencies, and you could buy a professional home gym for every U.S. household -- or hand each $4,270 in cash.

$487 billion in gas, sweat and stretch pants

Yes, it sounds a little wild, but the implications of a leaner, meaner country add up to a weighty $487 billion. That's almost 3.5% of gross domestic product, no small sum.

Mind you, only 1.8% of that is new growth. The rest is a radical shift in resources, away from the needs of our bigger citizens to . . . well, whatever we and our overlords would spend these extra billions on.

First, let's put the meat on that $487 billion. The estimates below assume the average American adult is at least 20 pounds overweight, a figure nutritionists see as fair.

  • Savings on fuel for cars and airlines due to their lighter loads would top $5 billion, according to industry studies. Researchers say each overweight driver burns about 18 additional gallons of gas a year, or just under a billion gallons altogether. Savings in the air are far greater: The jet-fuel savings alone could double North American airlines' forecast 2008 profits to $3.8 billion and maybe persuade them to stop stranding passengers because they can't afford the fuel for flights. As for oil imports, they'd be dented by less than 1%.

  • Plus-sized clothing costs 10% to 15% more, so shoppers would save $10 billion on shirts, pants and dresses. And clothes might fit better too. Cynthia Istook, an associate professor in textile apparel at North Carolina State University, says the economies of making fewer sizes would be tremendous. Clothing makers could then afford to offer more variety in hip and bust sizes, rather than asking every woman to squeeze into an hourglass shape.

  • Because 3,500 calories translates into a pound of fat, somewhere along the way, America's 227 million adults have eaten 16 trillion calories too many. That's 14 billion Big Mac meals, with fries and a soda. Eliminate those and you wipe out $81 billion, or McDonald's past four years of sales.

  • If Americans were slim and maintained their weight by eating 150 fewer calories a day (half a slice of pizza), that could snip roughly 6.5%, or $20 billion a year, off U.S. farmers' sales (assuming no extra exports). Bob Young, the American Farm Bureau's chief economist, says farmers would cope. They'd switch some land from fattening seed oils and sugar beets to fruits and vegetables. Or they might grow corn for ethanol, or even open a hunting resort.

  • The medical costs of obesity-related problems such as diabetes, stroke and heart disease run near $140 billion, or more than 6% of all health-care costs. That ballpark figure was calculated by Joel Cohen, an economic researcher for the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality, using data from a 1998 Centers for Disease Control and Prevention study. Cohen reckons that if no one were fat, medical insurance costs would fall -- to everyone's delight -- and doctors and drug makers could do more preventive care. That sounds good, but Roland Sturm, a senior economist for Rand in Santa Monica, Calif., doubts anyone would pay for preventive care. More likely, he says, some doctors would be on the street. "They could drive cabs," he suggests.

  • Productivity in the workplace would jump as people took fewer sick days and spent less time at work feeling unwell. Ross DeVol, the director of health economics at the Milken Institute, says the loss of productivity due to people showing up at work sick is "immense." Using a recent Milken report on the subject, he calculates that if no one were obese, the added output from workers and their caregivers would give the country a $257 billion boost. That's 1.8% of GDP, enough extra output to allow businesses to hire tens of thousands more workers or to raise wages, economists say. Or at least, that's the theory. Given bosses' love of expanding their profits and their own pay, you can count on some of this being spirited away. Just look at 2000 to 2005, when worker productivity rose 16.6% while median wages rose less than half that amount.

  • "Jenny Craig would be very unhappy" if everyone were slim, says Rand's Sturm. And so she would, along with the rest of the $55 billion weight-loss industry. Trimmed-down citizens would be swapping their diet pills for bikinis and their gastric-banding for nose jobs.

it goes on to end with a section on what to do with all the money saved... but i thought this was interesting... i dont exactly agree with some of the things said in this one, but it's not for me to judge. :)

-kmw-

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

priceless

my best friend and i were sitting in the back row at church after i was finished leading the music, just sitting there, enjoying the meeting, and while i was looking around the room to see who/what i could see i noticed that all three of these boys in the row ahead of us were sitting the exact same way... left elbow up on the back, right arm down, head slightly tilted...
from left to right: Mr. Ex-Roommate-That-I-Don't-Have-A-Name-For, Mr. DC's (aka: Mr. Anti-Social) and Mr. Soccer...
it was pretty funny... i nudged Sylvia and she looked and then said to get out my phone and take a picture... i'm gunna take this opportunity to say that i'm just following Mr. Soccer's example... i know it's not really allowed to take pictures in the chapel, but this was priceless.

Monday, April 28, 2008

mariners and french toast...

the ward went to the Mariner's game on Saturday... good times had by all. the sun was out (mostly) it wasn't too hot or too cold, we were surrounded by friends, the M's won... all in all it was a fantastic experience! i took a bunch of pictures, you'll have to check out my facebook for those :) this was my favorite one of all the pictures i took...
i'm not as much of a baseball fan as i wish i was... i guess the game is just a little too sporadic in it's excitement for me... and there's not enough contact... football is my sport of choice...
but considering that the football season doesn't start til September 4th, baseball it is... there were a bunch of people there and it was a blast! :) my least favorite part though... Mr. Soccer, Mr. DCs and their ex-roommate who i don't have a name for yet, came for a bit, and then left to go over to Qwest for Supercross... oh the JEALOUSY!!! (i've gone past the "green with envy" stage... now i'm just flipping through the colors with jealousy...) i wanted to go SOOO bad!! but i was a driver for a carpool, and my best friend and i couldn't just ditch our carpool-ies, ya know?? oh well... maybe i'll go next year... or maybe i'll fly to Vegas for it next weekend... be spontaneous like that... if only.


THEN... Sunday my best friend and i went over to Mr. Soccer and Mr. DCs abode to make breakfast for dinner... yes, in that beautiful kitchen that i'm so jealous of!! i finally got to cook in it... and it was fanTAStic... we made my dad's famous french toast, hash browns, bacon... mmmmmmm... so good!! i have to admit, i was a little nervous at first... i mean i've made this breakfast a hundred times, if not more, but having people hover over me while i'm making it, expecting something great... yikes!! i'm pretty sure i was shaking... but everyone was pretty lax about it... which made me calm myself down a bit :) it was a way fun time!! we (sylvia and i) provided food and Mr. Soccer and Mr. DCs provided entertainment: Mr. Soccer played the piano and both of them sang... they're quite talented if i do say so myself. i might have to take advantage of that and have them be a special musical number for me one of these Sundays... ;) be prepared to be amazed!
after dinner we had brownies and ice cream and played/watched them play this AWESOME and ADDICTING video game called N+... omigosh... it keeps me up at night! the background music plays in my head and i'm all jumpy cuz i don't wanna land on a mine! it's a fun game though... much more fun than other games i've played... if you die, you don't just fall over like in Halo... your body actually gets blown to smithereens... and pieces of you fly around the screen, setting off more bombs or mines or whatever they are... it's pretty cool... i started to get mad though... i'm not one to take it lightly if i lose repeatedly... i kinda wanted to huck the controller at the tv a few times...
anyway... it was way fun. definitely gunna hafta do that again! :)
thanks for having us over guys!! and thanks for letting me cook in that AWESOME kitchen of yours... LOVE it! :)
bbq ribs next time?? done. (fyi... it's kinda a long process)

-kmw-

Saturday, April 26, 2008

i can have this...

sally and stink were at Walgreen's one night and there were these people there... we love to people watch... they were being so ridiculously hilarious that we have since quoted them and their ridiculousness and it's pretty dang funny...
the 2 quotes are "i can have this" and "shut up, i'm trying to pick out a present"
for the whole, gut-busting story you'll have to read sally's blog...

last night... picture this: dad, standing behind the couch, mom sitting on the couch, sally sitting on the floor by the TV and me, in the hall...
there's this over-the-toilet cabinet thing in a box in the hall...
me: is this going upstairs? or in my bathroom?
mom: in your bathroom
me: "i can have this..."
sally: shut up...
dad: shut up, i'm trying to think about a Christmas present...
me: ...what?!
mom, sally, me: *laughing so hard we almost peed our pants*
sally: (for the rest of the night) shut up, i'm trying to think about a Christmas present for you...

for some reason my dad can't quote things quite right... ever...
he tries, really he does, and it's so funny because he says what he THINKS are the right words... but really they're not... he does it with movie lines, funny things that we've said in the past, or pretty much anything... and then a new quote is born in the hysterical laughter of his "re-arranged" quote... hahaha!!!

gotta love family...

-kmw-

Friday, April 25, 2008

TAG! you're it...

i was reading my cousin's blog, getting an update on their life that i've been missing since last summer... and i saw this "tagged" blog and thought it was a way fun idea
so i decided to play tag and see how it went...

4 JOBS I'VE HAD IN MY LIFE:
1. Dairy Queen when i was 16 (never again... ugh!)
2. Coldwell Banker Bain as a Personal Assistant in (august-december '04)
3. Lowe's HIW (august '04-december '06)
4. WISM/WAPT (april '07-current)

4 MOVIES I WOULD (OR HAVE) WATCHED OVER AND OVER:
1. 300
2. P&P, S&S, MAAN
3. Tommy Boy
4. So I Married an Aze Murder

4 PLACES I'VE LIVED:
1. Kirkland, WA
2. Nauvoo, IL
3. Rexburg, ID
4. TBD

4 PEOPLE WHO EMAIL ME REGULARLY:
1. mom
2. brian
3. bishop or counselors
4. urban dictionary wotd

4 OF MY FAVORITE FOODS/RESTAURANTS:
1. TDM (Taco Del Mar)
2. Sakura Teriyaki
3. Red Robin
4. AppleBee's

4 PLACES I'D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW:
1. in my bed
2. Hawaii (never been...)
3. tanning
4. kickin it with Peyton Manning

4 THINGS I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO IN 2008:
1. SUMMER!!! (including: sun, 4th of July, boating, tanning in the REAL sun...)
2. family reunion in august
3. losing 40lbs
4. paying off my credit cards

4 FRIENDS I WANT TO TAG:
1. sisters: Jennalee, Emily and Molly (yeah, i know that's 3 people... sue me)
2. brother: Fleet aka: SALLY!!
3. Brian Lutz
4. Mike Shin

back to basics...

the draft starts tomorrow at noon... now, i know how some of this works, but i still had some questions, so i went looking for answers... i decided to post my findings here for anyone else that was wondering how and why the NFL Draft works...
look how resourceful i am ;) yay for Google!

How is the NFL Draft Order determined?

• The team with the lowest winning percentage at the end of the previous season drafts first in the NFL Draft.
• The rest of the teams are placed in order from lowest winning percentage to the highest.
• The Super Bowl winner drafts last, even if they do not have the highest winning percentage.
• The Super Bowl loser drafts next to last.
• Strength of schedule for the previous season is the first tie-breaker for teams with the same winning percentage.
• Divisional and conference records are the next step in the tie-breaking procedure.
• As a last resort, a coin toss is used to determine the order of selection for teams with the same winning percentage.
• If a playoff and non-playoff team end the season with the same winning percentage, the non-playoff team selects before the playoff team regardless of strength of schedule.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

a two part blog about stupidity

"facing up" is always better than "bowing out"

for the love.
if people would just confront their problems and get them out in the open and taken care of, the world would be a much happier place.
the way people pussy foot around the proverbial "bush" is driving me absolutely CRAZY...
i'm tired of people taking out their frustrations with the way people are, on innocent and irrelevant objects without confronting the person (or object) that they're having an issue with. i mean honestly... fighting over myspace, facebook, whatever...
dumb.
"fighting online is like being in the Special Olympics.... even if you win you're still a retard"
sorry, that's a little harsh, but OH-so-true.
i don't know about you, but i would rather have someone that's angry with me, for whatever reason, TELL ME about it, rather than talk to their friends or just let the problem fester and get worse and worse til they HATE me, and then not even remember why.
yes, some things go away if you ignore them long enough, but if you don't tell someone that whatever they're doing is bothering you, there's no chance of them ever changing or fixing the problem.
i'm convinced this is why people, who were SO happily married, get divorced...
"what we've got here, is a failure to communicate"
stop writing notes.
stop changing your "status".
TALK for crying out loud!


NOW... for the second part of this vent-session of a blog...


i absolutely HATE... hate Hate HATE HATE people that don't know how to freaking drive.
if i were in charge, people would have to RE-take the drive-test, as well as the written, at age 60.
you don't pass, you don't drive.
simple as that.
so... i'm coming home from down-town Kirkland with Sylvia, just drivin' along, eastbound 85th street... 35-40mph... whatever... i'm coming up on the freeway entrance/exits and there's a car, a Subaru Outback (i kid you not) coming off the exit where they SHOULD yield and then merge into traffic...
well, this high-and-mighty, owner-of-the-road, jerk decides that he doesn't want to yield, even though i'm going 40 and not slowing down. he's supposed to yield, right? hmm...
so he's "comin' in!! and if i didn't see him, accident..." so i slam on my breaks, LAY on the horn and don't let up until they have turned the corner past the car dealership and gotten out of my way... (for those of you that don't know Kirkland very well, that's a good block-and-a-half and yes, i was laying on my horn the whole time) of course i yelled a few not-so-nice words at him as i was laying on my horn... and as we passed them i noticed, besides the stupid car they were driving, that they were OLD people!! UGH!
if i had a gun there'd be a lot less stupid people on the road.
for the love.
if you don't know how to use those pedals by your feet, get the CRAP out of the car, and OFF the road!
honestly.
now to touch on the Subaru Outback thing...
i can say, truthfully, that more than a handful of times i've almost been in an accident while driving behind, next to, in front of, anywhere within a 100-foot radius of a Subaru Outback.
they slam on their breaks at just-turned-yellow lights, drive 5 miles under the speed limit, don't know how to read when it comes to road signs, try and run you off the road because they can't for the life of them look in their blind-spots before merging, and in general are older-than-crap, tree-hugging, organic-food-eating, "green"-thinking, "hiking-is-a-sport" yuppies that wouldn't know normality if it bit them in the ARMpit...
RRRAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!
*heavy sigh* (mom: "eyeballs and a belly button...")
anyway... i think that's enough for today...
have a nice day!


-kmw-

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

40lbs. by AUG 6th OR BUST!!

so, i know i've blogged about this a couple times before, but whatever... it never hurts to be "enthusiastic" about losing weight.
since the last time i posted about this i've become a little more serious about it too...
i had a big motivation burst yesterday! i came to work, as usual and brought my "extreme gulp" jug full of ice water to drink. it's about 64oz. and i usually drain one in a work day (5 hours) which isn't bad if you ask me!!
but anyway, where i work, DLP also does Fire Fighter Testing, so yesterday there were a couple of them here and one of them asked me about my jug of water... i said that i had 32lbs left to lose by August 6th...
"why that number? and why that date?"
"well, my whole family is coming into town for my family reunion that day... and i don't wanna be the cow in all the pictures..."
"*haha* i see! well, that's a good way to start! most of the time when someone starts to lose weight it's mostly water weight that goes first."
"yeah, i've decided to cut out pop and burgers..."
"good idea! do you plan out your meals?"
"i don't, but i should..."
"well, when you plan to plan out your meals, you should try and eat 4-6 small meals a day... a serving the size of your fist, lots of fruits and vegetables, fiber, carbs... what have you been working on so far?"
"well, it's been baby steps so far, so i'm not shocking the crap out of my body, ya know... i don't eat after 9pm, it would be earlier, but i don't get off work til 7 or later every night... but yeah, that and i don't drink pop or eat out, and i try and drink lots and lots of water."
"do you eat a lot of dairy?"
"uh... well, i drink milk...??"
"what about cottage cheese?"
"eww... no... not a fan"
"it's good for you... i don't really like it either, but you might try mixing it half and half with yogurt, maybe throw in some fruit... and there's a meal!"
"hmm... i'll have to try that... :)"
"yeah, it seems like you've got a good idea of what you need to do, now all you have to do is actually DO IT!"
"yeah, i've gotta force myself for a bit, but i think i'll be able to just form a habit..."
"yeah, and if you need or want any pointers, just give us a call at the Fire Department and ask for me! i'd be more than happy ta help you out."
"THANKS! that would be awesome!"
he was a pretty awesome guy... not bad looking either... hmm...
THEN my co-worker came in and she's a personal trainer...
i asked her if i could pick her brain for some other ideas on what i could cut out, add in, or change, and we had a good chat about calories and how much i was taking in... and how much i SHOULD be taking in... and how i need to actually drag my sorry butt out of bed in the morning and get my metabolism going so i'm not just retaining water and being a slug...
and THEN one of the dad's of one of our athletes came in and mentioned to me that i looked thinner... (which i thought was AWESOME...) i said that i'd only lost 8lbs in the last month, but i guess... THANKS!! :) he asked me what i was doing and i went through the whole shpeal (if that's a word) again and said that i had been going through boxes and found pictures of what i looked like in high school... DANG i looked good... if only... so i said that i was on my way to making my Drivers License accurate again... :)
anyway, so yeah... BIG motivation day for me...
so this morning, instead of rolling over and shutting off my very-loud-alarm (the NFL Theme) i actually got my sorry butt out of bed at 9, made breakfast, cleaned my room, finished my laundry, sorted a stack of papers while doing a few ab-exercises, had a healthy lunch with some friends, and now i'm at work...
i've had about 60oz of water today and had to pee-like-sea-biscuit about 6 or 8 times already...
talk about flushing your system! no joke...
Day 1 and counting... wish me luck!!

-kmw-

holy slow texter...

for the life of me, i cant understand why it takes 5 years for people who are young(er) to send a text.
i mean c'mon.
even my DAD can send a text in a relatively short period of time!! and he's got fat fingers! (no offence dad... it's a small phone with small buttons... or something)
if you can't figure out the "T9", switch to manual! it's easy! the letters are printed on the keys!!
when you're trying to have a conversation with someone, through text, and they take over an hour to respond, MOST people have already forgotten what the conversation was about.
you have to go back into your outbox (if your phone automatically saves it) and see what you asked or said to get the response you did...
and if your phone doesn't save it you're S.O.L.
good luck piecing together the conversation.
it's even worse when it's inconsistent!!
explanation: if someone usually is a pretty quick responder, but then one day they just take forever, without ANY explanation or reason (i.e. working, in a meeting, sleeping...) it makes ya wonder 'um... hello? are you alive? or just ignoring me?'...
and vice-versa... if someone is notoriously slow at texting, i can get used to that. but when they all of a sudden start texting right back when you expect to have a good hour of waiting, it totally throws off the groove.
is it too much to ask for a little consistency!?!
for the record: this is NOT an attack on guys. girls, you do it too.
honestly people. use your thumbs...
yeah, i know that some people aren't the texting type, they prefer to talk on the phone or even be in person to have conversations...
there's nothing wrong with that!
i'm totally down for talking on the phone or going out to lunch and chatting over some good food, or even just kickin it and talking/venting while playing Madden NFL 08 or Grand Theft Auto IV or Rainbow Six Vegas II... or some game where you get to shoot things and people... (those of you that know me know that i mostly just watch these games... the only video game i'm actually good at is the old Mario Brothers games)
anyway... there's my little vent about Holy Slow Texters... hopefully i won't have to re-visit this one...

-kmw-

Monday, April 21, 2008

HA-larious!!

pretty much the funniest thing i've seen all week...


*thank you Sylvia for making me laugh*
totally busted up the first time i saw this picture...


and it still kills me!!


-kmw-

Saturday, April 19, 2008

been there, kissed that...

hahahahaha!! i can't get over how funny this one is...
the original has more types, but i copied the ones that i've personally experienced...

I have a tongue, too, thank you
Tom was a good-looking, smart guy who played guitar and opened every door for me, but he also had a knack for filling my entire mouth with his imperialistic tongue, which completely crushed mine as it recklessly reached for my tonsils. No matter what I did, I couldn’t remove it, mostly because my own tongue seemed to have disappeared. Lots of oral offenders’ tongues make the mistake of setting up permanent residence in their dates’ mouths. The tongue should be about playful give and take: Tease, then pull back. If that gets a positive response, venture a little further, but never leave your date thinking, “What the heck happened to my tongue?” or “Red alert: Suffocation setting in!”

Mr. Hoover (more recent than the others...foul)
Mr. Hoover is the opposite of the previous smoocher—he likes to suck your tongue right out of your mouth and hold onto it. If your date’s entire head is unwillingly following yours because you’re holding her tongue hostage, that’s probably not a good thing. Tongue suction is tricky. Unless you know exactly the amount of suction to exert and the duration to hold your partner’s tongue captive (Hint: it’s not five minutes), you’re treading into Bad Kisser Land.

The Cheek-Licker
Licking or lapping your date’s cheek will leave him or her either (a) grossed out or (b) laughing (i personally laughed right out loud...). Licking people’s faces isn’t hot. (I don’t care if your girlfriend freshman year loved it; she was one in a million, maybe 100 million.) When it comes to kissing, the tongue should make contact with two — and only two — places above the shoulders besides the mouth—the neck and the ear. But if you shoot for these erogenous zones, don’t overdo it. Wet willies and hickeys are for amateurs.

i laughed the whole time i was reading this... *giggle-eww-giggle*
mostly because all i could think about was this picture that Sylvia had on her facebook... and it reminded me of a pretty bad experience i had with Mr. MormonHoover...
i repeat:
*giggle-eww-giggle*
i can honestly say that i just about peed my pants when i saw this picture...
so funny...

-kmw-

the last one single...

yup. i found yet another hilarious article! :) yay for MSN.com! this time i just picked out my favorites of the Q&A section...

So you’ve noticed that you’re the only one in your circle of friends who isn’t attached, engaged or married, huh?

here we go!! :)

Q: Why do so many women experience this type of panic?
A: Being single in this society is still the greatest of social stigmas—despite how many zeroes are at the end of our paychecks or initials after our name. Society still perceives singleness as a personal failure and sends us this classic mixed message that while we should flourish in our careers and embrace our independence, we’re still a failure if we’re single. And as our expectations rise in all other areas of life, they too are heightened when it comes to our “personal success” with marriage. So essentially, the Panic Years are both self-imposed and culturally-imposed.

if you're still single-and-30 (or 30+) it's not because you suck at life. if you're progressing and have a good career path you're fine! there's nothing wrong with trying to get ahead in life. if you're 30 and stagnant... that's just sad. get off your butt and do something!

Q: To get through the Panic Years, you recommend that women use “creative tactics” to find potential fiancés (PFs). What are some of these tactics?
A: Instead of retracing stale dating routes that aren’t getting you anywhere, look for opportunities in places you might have missed. When life hands you an emergency-room visit for that skiing mishap, make nice with the cute, single resident on call! Look at every event in life as an opportunity—and not just one that passes you by, but one you must seize! Who said you can’t find a cute, straight guy at jury duty? Instead of idling away at the inscrutable Latin carved on the walls, a woman I know made small talk with juror #5, her current boyfriend of more than a year.

HA-larious! i think i'll take this opportunity to quote my favorite movie... i'm pretty sure that if you go around "making nice" with anything male (or female) that moves and breathes you'll become "the most determined flirt that ever made [yourself and your] family ridiculous." (Pride and Prejudice) no joke.

Q: How can women deal with what you call “Panic by Proxy,” the pressure from pushy parents and friends?
A: What those people putting pressure on you don’t know won’t hurt them. Exercise your right to keep the play-by-play of your relationship as private as possible. And don’t be afraid to confront these people once and for all. Confront the offenders head-on and explain that their projected pressure onto you is self-defeating. Let them know that it is crushing your self-esteem and putting an undue strain on your relationship with them.

tell them to back the heck off... there's nothing wrong with being single dang it!! just because all 3 of your sisters are happily married, 2 of them with 4 children each and the other with 2, doesn't mean you have to run out and get yourself hitched to the first guy you "crush" on... good grief!!

Q: What kind of dating expectations do you recommend single women experiencing the Panic Years set if they want to get married?
A: If you’re already planning your wedding to the guy you’re sitting across from on date number one, you’re in trouble. Not necessarily because he won’t be The One, but because you’re not even letting yourself be in the moment. Permit yourself to get lost in the date, get lost in your conversation, get lost in him. But whatever you do, don’t let yourself get lost in the single-mindedness of walking down the aisle by tomorrow. You will not only sabotage this relationship, but any future relationship with those kinds of expectations. At the same time, letting a “comfortable relationship” languish for years without any shift in momentum doesn’t bode well for your marital future, either. Don’t think about clinching the deal at every phase of your relationship, but do be cognizant of your needs and share that with your partner, who, if he’s the right one, will unquestionably respect that. But if he’s still sneaking you in through the service entrance of his building after months of dating, he’s pretty much telegraphing his true intentions for you.

ok, i agree with this last one. yes, i'm guilty of thinking "hmm... Mrs. Kiley So-and-So... that sounds nice" or even going as far as signing my first name with his last name... once upon a time i did that sort of thing! (yeah yeah, i know i'm still young and so it couldn't have been THAT long ago, but whatever... shut up.) thankfully, i can say i've moved on... matured, if you will. now it's just a funny, hi-i'm-ridiculous kind of thing that i make fun of... mostly i get a kick out it when people that still do that kind of thing can't, for the life of them, stop, but try and rationalize their way into sanity... right... been there, done that, got the t-shirt and the hat... not worth the extra stress!!

you stay classy... :)

-kmw-

Friday, April 18, 2008

unpredictable: seattle weather

i don't care what the weather man says, our weather canNOT be predicted...
from the time i got up this morning (yes, i was up at 9 this morning, shocker) until just now, 6:30pm, the weather has gone straight to crap. the sun was out and it was blue skies and beautiful weather until about... 1:30... then when i got to work it was sprinkling... at about 3 it started to hail... by 4 it was snowing, big flakes... and here we are, 6:30 and it's pouring down rain, flippin cold outside, and miserable, Seattle weather...
it's all quite depressing...
ok ok... the rain is great. it keeps everything fresh and green...
i just hate that everything is soggy all the time.
in my opinion, pouring rain is only good for 2 things:
making out like in the movies (i.e. The Notebook) and playing mud-football.
other than that... ugh. no wonder people are always sad and crabby... i don't blame them!! i've lived here my whole life!! the only time i've ever been away from here for an extended period of time is when i was at school in Illinois and then in Idaho... i was only gone for 3 or 4 months at a time... and that's only in the last 4 years... i think i should move... permanently... to a state with sunshine more often than not... this girl needs some sun!! none of this fake, tanning-bed stuff... (don't get me wrong, it's the greatest 12 minute nap in the world) i just need some real sun...
AHH! i just looked outside and it's raining AND snowing all at the same time... fan-flippin-tastic.

-kmw-

really??

for the love.
can we not do anything that makes sense?!
nope... i think not.
for some reason my family feels the need to make life as difficult as possibly possible for everyone else, mostly me... oh, and then they like to get on my case for being the one that wastes gas and time doing thing that "don't make economical sense"... really?
honestly people...
ok, so i live about 8 minutes away from my work. it's pretty much a straight shot if you're coming down 124th. tonight is "date night" so i called my dad and said:
"i'm having a thought here..."
"oh, does it hurt?" (he thinks he's SO funny)
"ha ha... so my thought is, how about before you and mom go out tonight, can you bring me a car?"
"maybe, we'll see what we can do."
"ok"
so that was about an hour and a half ago...
my brother calls me about 15 minutes ago and says:
"do you have a ride home from work?"
"no, i called and asked dad if he'd bring me a car"
"i thought you were going out tonight?"
"i am, but i'm driving tonight, she drove last time"
"well, we're all going to Lowe's and we don't know if we'll be done by 7"
"that's 2 hours away..."
"yeah, we don't know if we'll be done."
"well... why can't you just bring me a car and then go to Lowe's?"
"because..."
"that's a good reason..."
"we'll come pick you up when you get off work"
"um... whatever."
and i hung up...
for real people??
so they want to: drive here and pick me up, take me back to the house, and go to Lowe's in Bellevue, then i'll get the car and come BACK over here, by work, to pick up my "date" (if you will) Sylvia, just to go to Bellevue... uh...
my idea was to: drive both cars here, leave one, and THEN go to Lowe's so that i can pick up Sylvia on my way to Bellevue for the movie...
no... that would make sense... we're not real big on that... ridiculous...
such is life...

-kmw-

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Men's Aerotech 2's... size 6

they finally came...
they're on my feet...
i nearly hyperventilated while opening the box
before i opened the actual shoe box i had to breathe...
*in through the nose, out through the mouth*
i was driving at the time...
so i had a shoe in my lap...
my best friend had the other one in her lap...
we both smelled the "new shoe smell"
definitely the most exciting thing that's happened to me all freakin' week...
is that sad?? i think so...
but still....
aren't they beautiful!!??
SO worth the wait...
i think i'm so happy with my shoes that i may just forget about those stupid people and let them off the hook this once...
beautiful...
SO hott shoes...
i can't get over how hott they are...
dang.

-kmw-
p.s. i know all of you that got that mass-picture-text from me are just as excited as i am... ;)

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

holding my breath...

"hi, this is Mr. ICan'tCopyAnAddress, from UPS in Redmond... i'm calling for Kiley..."
"this is her."
"oh! ok, i'm calling because we have a package for you and i'm trying to get the correct address"
"that would be good... considering it's been almost 3 weeks..."
"*uneasy laugh* the address i have here is 12707 120th Street..."
"that's wrong."
"o...k, let me get a pen here and write down the correct address..."
"it's ONE-TWO-SEVEN-ZERO-SEVEN, ONE-HUNDRED-TWENTIETH AVENUE NORTHEAST, SUITE ONE-HUNDRED..."
(i don't think i could have spelled it out or enunciated my words more clearly... i felt like i was talking to a child... but hey, whatever it takes, right?)
"ok, great, that will be delivered tomorrow"
"great. i'll be waiting."
"have a nice day"
"oh i will... as soon as they get here"
"*uneasy laugh* bye"

so... tomorrow it is...
no problem...
that's just... ya know...
20 days from the day i ordered them...
18 days from when they were shipped...
EIGHTEEN days!!
yeah, that sounds like "3-7 business days, not including weekends" to me!
then there's the 8 days, from the day they delivered it to the wrong address, it would take to "track it down and re-route it"...
tomorrow would be day 7 of those 8 days...
RAR!
i'm happy... but at the same time i'm still pissed off...
it's a mixed emotion.

-kmw-

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

been there, dated that...

at work i find myself usually perusing through the articles on MSN.com, reading anything that grabs my attention... mostly i read the ones with titles that make me smile a little or even laugh right out loud... like today's article:

Love Tips from Animal Trainers

They’ve trained dogs to sit, dolphins to flip mid-air, and bears to balance on balls and play the harmonica. But can animal trainers also teach us a thing or two about taming our romantic partners? It’s a strange concept, and yet Amy Sutherland, who’d observed animal trainers in action, decided to apply the same techniques toward changing a few of her husband Scott’s less savory habits. After secretly subjecting him to a few training sessions, Sutherland was pleasantly surprised to see major improvements: Suddenly, Scott was happily picking up socks, shaving more often, and driving under the speed limit. In short, animal training had helped her mold her guy into a model sweetie.

she, the author, continues on with a Q&A section that i found humorous...

Q: First off, isn’t it a little insulting to “train” people like animals? Haven’t we evolved more sophisticated ways to convey our needs, like talking?
A: Talking is overrated. We rely on it too much when we have other tools at our disposal. We think, “If only I explained things just right to my date, that will solve the problem.” And it’s fine to say something once. But all too often we just end up repeating ourselves with no luck. Animal trainers, on the other hand, don’t have the luxury of speech. They can’t tell a hyena, “Now, if you could just stand up on your hind legs and turn around….” As a result, they’re masters at changing behavior in an entirely different way. And we can learn from them.

for real?! talking is overrated?? hmm... if there's another way, what is it?! treats? "sweet-tooth" motivation to do our bidding?

Q: So what, in a nutshell, is the secret to training a romantic partner?
A: The most important thing to remember with people as well as animals is that punishment isn’t an effective way to get what you want. You don’t teach a sea lion to flip by nagging; likewise, I couldn’t convince my husband Scott to change by nagging either. So instead of punishing him when he didn’t pick up his socks, I started rewarding him when he did. And it worked. The same technique applies to dating scenarios, too. If someone says he’s going to call on a certain night then doesn’t, chewing him out when he finally does contact you will only further discourage him from calling. So, while it’s tempting to say, “It’s great to hear from you but…” stick to “It’s great to hear from you,” period.

i agree that punishing someone doesn't work... in fact i think it would make them love you less... or at least be less inclined to show you affection. at least give them the chance to make it up to you... ;)

Q: So what should you do if you’ve got the opposite problem, where someone is calling too often and being clingy?
A: For this, what comes to mind is a technique I learned from a professional trainer who’d taught African crested cranes to stop landing on his head. Rather than discouraging the cranes from landing on him, he laid some mats on the ground and encouraged the cranes to land there instead. Likewise, if someone’s calling you constantly asking when you’re free, fighting off the entreaties with “I’m busy” won’t do much good. Assuming you really do want to see this person when you can, you can put an end to the pestering simply by setting a firm date to get together, even if that’s far in the future. Since you’ve made a plan, your date can focus on that and no longer has a reason to bug you before then.

currently having this issue with Mr. SingleForLife... but what if i don't really wanna see him again?? i don't think setting a date to get together will make him stop... wouldn't that have the opposite effect??

Q: What if the person you’re trying to train doesn’t seem to be improving?
A: Take baby steps. You can’t teach a baboon to ride a skateboard all in one day. First, you teach the baboon to sit on it, then stand on it, and so on. Likewise, if your date is chronically late, you can’t expect that she’ll suddenly start showing up on time. Maybe, instead of being a half-hour late, she’ll only make you wait 15 minutes. That’s progress and you should acknowledge that.

why should you need to train someone to do things the way you want them to? if you fell in love with them, or even if you just LIKE them, isn't it who they are now, that you fell for? not the thing you're trying to make them become??

Q: Only what exactly should you give someone as a “reward”? Obviously you’re not talking about biscuits here.
A: The reward can be anything someone likes, and it’s good to mix it up. Any prize will lose its value if it becomes too predictable. My dog Penny Jane loves treats, but she also likes getting her chin scratched, so I’ll use those, too. My list for Scott includes smiles, kisses, hugs, head rubs, compliments, and presents—especially stereo and bike gear. On dates, if you always bring flowers, give the same compliment, or wait until the end of the evening to move in for a kiss, things will get stale pretty fast. A little variety – by, say, kissing at the beginning or in the middle of the date instead of at the doorstep – will keep things interesting.

interesting... that's for sure. gotta love variety!!

Q: Are there certain behaviors that are too entrenched to change?
A: Absolutely. You can’t keep a badger from digging, and I can’t stop Scott from losing his wallet and keys. In relationships, women often pressure men to be more talkative, while men try to get women to cool it on the communication front. I doubt either gender will train the other to change any time soon, so it’s a waste of time to try. A woman once complained to me that her boyfriend tended to text her rather than call. She took it personally, as if it were a sign he didn’t care. But chances are, it has nothing to do with her. He just loves texting, and she might have to accept that’s how he prefers to communicate.

i have nothing to say to this... mostly cuz i agree...

Q: So now that your husband Scott knows to pick up his socks, shave, and drive under the speed limit, what’s next on your wish list?
A: Scott could really use a haircut. In the past, I would have nagged him about it, but now I keep my mouth shut. The day he does come home with a haircut, though, I’m going to shower him with appreciation.

whatever... only if there's "gold" involved...

Q: Does Scott train you, too?
A: Totally. When I briefly had braces and was on a teary tirade about how much pain I was in, Scott didn’t respond at all. This is a common technique that trainers use on dolphins called the Least Reinforcing Scenario, or L. R. S. for short. When a dolphin misbehaves by squirting water on the trainer, the best response is to ignore it, since any reaction, positive or negative, will only fuel the behavior. Once I realized Scott wasn’t going to coddle or carp on me for whining, I ran out of steam. Then it hit me what he was doing. “Did you just give me an L. R. S.?” I asked him. He didn’t respond to that, either. But clearly, it worked.

i'm pretty sure this works with kids too... most people, if ignored, will knock off whatever behavior is being ignored... when you don't get a desired reaction or a "rise" out someone, it's kinda boring to bug or complain to them...

-kmw-

Monday, April 14, 2008

"boys are scared of me..."


best. conversation. ever.


"what am i going to do when you get married?"

"you don't have to worry, i'm not getting married..."

"yes you are, and i'll bet you get married before i do..."

"no, (with a somewhat sad, pouty face) boys are scared of me"

*both laughing histerically*

"that was the best face i've ever seen... priceless!! you looked almost... sad!"

totally made my evening... :)


-kmw-

ode to Mr. Soccer

i'd like to take this opportunity to praise one of my heroes:
Mr. Soccer... (self appointed codename)
he is a great friend to his friends...
example: he lets his friends crash on his floor when they've had a long day and need to "charge"...
he's a magnificent photographer, if anyone needs Senior Pictures, Wedding Photos, Bridals, Scenic Views for Backgrounds... anything, just hit him up and boom. perfection in a flash. (get it?)
he lights up a room with his presence. can't you just tell he's a little ray of sunshine?! (see picture)
he's crazy strong... i'll bet he spends hours on end at the gym... look at those arms...
he entertains the masses with his cheerful disposition and willingness to provide others with "life lessons" based on his knowledge and extensive life experience.
he loves to travel... especially with friends. one day he hopes to go to the moon. (hey, let me know if it's really made of cheese)
he's awesome at video documentaries of his "happ'nin life" and the lives of his friends...
mostly, he's an all around awesome person.

oh, did i mention that he's got some pretty stellar hobbies?
they include, but are not limited to:
-blogging from his phone
-harassing people at church activities
-blog-stalking
-attempting to "decode" my blog
-getting knocked out at sports night
-locking himself out of his apartment
-getting knocked out while snowboarding
-making videos that could make someone nauseous
-posting about world changing events

AND i'm pretty sure that he's convinced that everyone reads his blogs to find the true meaning of life and to help them get through their day without thoughts of suicide... (some of those people had a little scare while he had a pause in postings... lets hope THAT never happens again! sheesh!) i can honestly say i read his blog religiously! if i didnt have his blog, i'd be lost.

i think this pretty much sums up my hero!!
thanks for being the greatest Mr. Soccer!!

-kmw-

silly silly blog-stalkers...

no need for names, or even codenames here...

you know who you are...

you think you're SO smart!

trying to de-code my blogs... tsk tsk...

for all you know my codenames could be completely irrelevent!

you would never know the difference!!

HA!

good luck trying to figure it out! :)

-kmw-

REE-diculous

FIRST of all... the adult-drama is about enough to make me want to run and hide...
maybe in Scotland...
i can't handle the ridiculousness (as my sister would say "we've gone past ridiculous to reDONKulous") i kinda wish people would grow up sometimes... i mean come on, if you're old enough to live on your own, rent a car, pay taxes and/or legally go to a bar, don't you think you should at least TRY and act your age?! even if it's just sometimes?!
the gossip circulated between people in their 20's is worse than it ever was in jr. high and high school, and therefore enough to kill me! and for SURE i'd die laughing!! oh the stupid things i've heard... good-freaking-grief people... i can't decide if it's hilarious or just dumb... optimistically thinking: it's the silliness it takes to make it through the day without getting sucked into the monotony...
change of topic...
i just can't win!!! the saying "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em"... not exactly my style. i always win. something Mr. AwkwardTurtle and i have in common. (as some of you may remember his alias... Mr. ICan'tLose... so true) something must have gone wrong somewhere because i'm just going along my super-little-life and i still feel like i'm just running into the same dang wall!! why won't it just crumble already?!
dilemma: Mr. CurrentlyUntouchable...
can i just say that i HATE the "arms-length" rule?!
most of the people that know me, know that i don't shake hands. it's too impersonal... it's like saying "hi! i'm sure you're great, but could you please stay THIS far away from me?" i'm a very touchy-feely-huggy-lovey kind of person. i'll hug someone i've just met before i'll shake their hand. (ok, if it's inappropriate for me to hug someone i've JUST met i'll go ahead and shake their hand... like my boss or a random married guy, or... i dunno... the pope... that might be awkward)
anyway, i have to wait almost a flippin' YEAR til i can hug this one!! for the love... figures. the first MORMON i've got the twitterpated-giggles for in the longest time and it's like he's got a force-field! crap!
yes, the fact that he's a Mormon is a big deal... this doesn't happen to me... i've only kissed 2 Mormons in my whole life and BOTH times it was terrible... (is it a Mormon-guy trait to be bad at kissing? yikes!) the fact that i even like a Mormon guy, that i'm willing to even GO THERE after those 2 "experiences", is a big shocker for most people...
ok maybe not most people, just some...
ok maybe not anyone except me but whatever.
you get the point.
i'd SO be down for moving to Arizona in December... just puttin' that out there...
just so everyone knows: i'm going to be the most awesome wife ever!! just ask my best friend, aka: Silvia (codename compliments of Mr. PizzaCutter). she'll second my motion in a heartbeat!
i rock. (yes Mr. GunnaGetAMiniVan, i'm tooting my own horn... again... that's twice in one night!)
for starters, i cant STAND a dirty kitchen... or a dirty house for that matter, but most of the magic happens in the kitchen... (it will be the biggest room in my dream house, besides the master bedroom of course) and because of that i compulsively clean and tidy-up without even thinking about it... (tidying up does not include moving furniture... again, ask Silvia... if the furniture has been moved, something has pissed me off...)
some might say that i'm slightly over the top with my O.C.D. but i like to call it organized... i guess i can thank my roommates for that one... FREAK! being at school and living in an apartment with 5 other girls... i felt like i had 5 kids!! i did everything... dishes, garbage, vacuuming, laundry, sweeping, bathrooms, and on top of all that, i fixed both toilets, replaced the tub faucet, fixed the dish washer AND the disposal... oh yeah... who needs a handy man?!
oh, and i plan on watching football on Sundays, Mondays, Saturdays and even Thursdays... no doubt about it.
all of that makes me the future MostAmazingWifeEver... among other things of course... the list goes on but it's almost 2am again...
ANYWAY... now that i've completely gone off topic...
(i'm afraid some of you might think i'm slightly shallow after this next comment...)
i pretty much only started talking to Mr. CurrentlyUntouchable because of his shoes... (obsess much?)
reason: i got to kick it with a bunch of the AlsoUntoucables (relatives... in one way or another) and happened to notice his fantastic ADIOs... yes, i'm in love with skate shoes, lea'me alone... so of course, i went out of my way to strike up a conversation. it was awesome because we hit it off right away... mostly, i think, because we started talking about shoes, and coincidentally i was wearing a beautiful, freshly-cleaned, pair of ADIOs myself! FANtastic...
but... i just can't win this time... ladies, you know what i mean... we always go for the ones that are JUST out of reach... good honk.
i'll have to let you know, in a year, where this ends up going... (my guess is a whole-lot-a NOWHERE...) for the time being... peace out.


-kmw-

p.s. i promised a personal shout-out to Mr. PizzaCutter... lovin' the blog!! you keep me entertained!! you're the best!! lotsa love! peace out homie. hope that "new-family" business works out for ya!!

Friday, April 11, 2008

i found the word i was looking for...

furious
1. Full of or characterized by extreme anger; raging.
2. Suggestive of extreme anger in action or appearance; fierce.

i think that pretty much sums it up.
today i got to the point where i had tears of rage in my eyes, threatening to ruin my non-water-proof makeup.
i STILL don't have my shoes. today is Friday, April 11th, as it says above this post. that's 13 days since i ordered my shoes and 11 since they were shipped. oh, and 4 days since they were delivered to the wrong freaking address.
now, any of you that know me know that i'm a very... lets say, out spoken person. i tend to let people know exactly how i feel, even if they don't ask how i'm doing. i also don't believe in taking crap from ANYONE at all. i have very little respect for authority (unrighteous dominion) and even less respect for people that are STUPID and can't do anything at all that requires half a braincell. for the love. dealing with these people who are in Customer Service, but don't know the meaning of it, has spun me into a dimension of pissed off i've never been before in my life. (borrowed that from Ron White)
i called the Customer Service number on the receipt from Journeys and spoke to someone there again about tracking down my order. he took down my information and said that their system was down and that he'd have to give me a call back when he could look at my order and give me any information about it.
that's annoying!!
THEN i called the Journeys store and asked to speak to the manager or supervisor. the chick that answered the phone said that she was the only manager there at the time, so i said:
"ok, i have a big problem, first of all my shoes have been lost, secondly the people that i've talked to from there don't know how to communicate and frankly are very rude. i was told one thing by one person, and a completely different thing by another. and i was also told, quite rudely i might add, that 'there's only one guy that works here and i don't think he would have told you that there's no number to call to track the order' and i don't really appreciate being treated like that."
"uh... that was me that you talked to, and the only thing i can really say is that the store manager will be back in 20-30 minutes, so you can call back and talk to her... i don't know what else to tell you... as far as your shoes being lost, as soon as we put the order in and UPS takes over there's nothing we can really do about it..."
so i said i'd call back...
in the mean time, the guy from Journeys Customer Service called me back and told me some different information than the guy i talked to last time... apparently it takes 8 days, not "a few", to track down an order and get it either re-routed or re-shipped to the correct address. of course i was pissed. he put me on hold for about 5 or 6 minutes and when he came back he apologized and said that he was looking up the tracker to see if and when it started and said that NEXT Friday they will have concluded their investigation... rar. another freaking week... i also asked him if there was a number for UPS itself that i could call and talk to someone, to which he replied that, in all honesty, it wouldn't do me any good to call them because the only thing they could do was track it, and that was already happening. whatever. he told me that someone from UPS should be calling me in the next couple of days to tell me exactly where they were in their investigation and exactly what would happen with my shoes.
by the time i finished up talking to that guy i had about 4 minutes to cool off before i called Journeys back to talk to the store manager.
i called, she, the store manager, answered...
"ah, just the person i wanted to talk to... ok, first of all, i understand that after you guys send in an order to UPS there's nothing really you can do about it and whether or not it's delivered on time. just so you know, they lost my shoes... well, delivered them to the wrong address... and i'm not happy about it. ("oh, of course, i'd be pissed too") yeah, so what i'm calling to talk to YOU about is your associates and how rude and unprofessional they treat your customers. i was treated very poorly, spoken to very rudely, and given different information each time that i've called over the past couple days that i've been conversing with your store. i don't know how else to say it, but the communication between your associates sucks. i'm not happy. (for mole: not happy bob, not happy...) i think that's pretty obvious. this is the second time that i've had a bad experience with you guys. the first time was about a year ago and instead of it being a miss-delivery on UPS' part it was on you guys because whoever put my order in the computer didn't actually submit it until 4 days later. ("oh... i'm sorry about that, that's ridiculous") yeah, it is. but i decided to give you guys the benefit of the doubt and give it another try... right now, i'm sorry that i did! i'm pretty unhappy with the service i've received. i thought you, being the store manager, should know how your employees are treating customers. i mean, i know how it goes with the whole "passing-the-buck" thing because i used to work in customer service. you pretty much get crapped on by people all the time. but having that experience i thought i'd bring it to your attention that your associates, even your manager 'the only guy that works there', have been treating people poorly and talking down to them... again, i understand the whole thing about how after you send in the order it's out of your hands, but even still the people working there are responsible for the way they treat customers. i mean it's basically up to them whether or not your store even retains customers."
there might have been a few "choice words" in there and maybe some more details that i've forgotten, but i think i've beaten this point into the ground.
she assured me that she would be personally handling the associates that i spoke with and store-wide speaking to the associates about good customer service.
my work here is done.
as for the UPS people... if i don't see some shoes by Friday i'm going straight to Corporate and demanding free delivery and a full refund on my order.
this is ridiculous.
someone's gunna wish they hadn't come to work next Friday if i don't have my feet in a pair of Mens DC Aerotech 2's - size 6 - black/grey/white/red...

until Friday.

-kmw-

my best friend... she came back!!

yay! my best friend, that one that moved away to Utah, is back! she got back recently and as always, we kicked it and then, of course, we got in the c-o-i*. and also, of course, we HAD to take pictures.
don't let this picture fool you... she loves me. :)
i mean, c'mon what are best friends for?!
i'm so excited to have her back in town!!
there's so much to talk about now that we can do it with facial expressions added into the conversation...
(trust me, it's more fun that way, it makes the story more interesting)
and we don't have to do "Reader's Digest Version" of stories because we're not worried about minutes or work getting in the way... it's great. she's the best.
since she's been back all i can think about is how many things we're gunna do, how great this summer is gunna be, and how i have my Partner in Crime back!! there are parties to be the life of, hundreds of cute and ridiculous pictures to take, guys to talk for about for hours on end, dumb girls we don't like to plot our revenge against (kidding) pillow fights to have in our "unmentionables" (kidding again...for real, we don't do that, sorry to disappoint ya guys)
but in all seriousness:
Woman, i freakin love you!! i know you'll read this at some point or another, maybe even twice if i'm lucky, so i just thought you should know!! you're the greatest!!! i'm way excited to have you back!! we gotta make this summer an awesome one!!
lots of love!!

*what's the c-o-i you ask?? my siblings and i used to ask if it was alright to get into the "h-o-t-t-u-b" when the kids were over so they wouldn't be upset because they couldn't get in with us. well one day my oldest niece, being the smart kid she is, figured it out... she walked up to granny and asked
"granny, can i get in the c-o-i?"
"what's the c-o-i?"
"da tub," she said with this look of DUH on her face...
thus: "c-o-i" it is and always will be.

-kmw-

Thursday, April 10, 2008

go from "nice gut"... to "nice butt!"

yet again... i'm sitting at home, it's almost 1am, watching anything that's on (currently Will & Grace, i freaking love this show) and this commercial comes on for Extra Gum and about how chewing it is healthy now because each stick only has 5 calories. it was inspirational... (haha...) and then i found this sour apple flavor(pictured)... so i've figured out something that might work... because i'm a big nerd... and i have to rationalize my way into just about everything i do...
(i hope you follow this...)
i can chew Extra 5-calories-a-stick gum, while burning off those 5 calories because of the clenching it causes in my cheeks and mouth muscles from the sour apple flavor (yeah yeah... make fun of me all you want, anything sour even CLOSE to my tongue and my cheeks start to tense up and my mouth waters... dont try and tell me it doesn't happen to you too) and then i can run and row-machine and do abs... it'll be great!
as some of you may know i was supposed to start in January and lose 40lbs by June 1st... well... because of that stupid procrastination thing (it's killin' me) it's April and i'm not even half way to my goal. so, i'm cheating and pushing the date back, as i mentioned in my other blog, to August 6th... the day people start showing up for my family reunion.
and like i said before, i'll update.
8 down, 32 to go!!

-kmw-

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

what's the word i'm looking for??

irritated? livid? pissed? angry? upset?
... all those and more...
for anyone wanting to purchase/order skate shoes, DON'T do it at Journey's. instead order your shoes from Zumiez or PacSun. at least THEY know what they're doing! the people i've spoken to over the past 3 or 4 days at Journey's, trying to locate my shoes, couldn't find their butt with both hands and a map. i swear. i'm really irritated with those stupid sales ASSociates at Journey's

sequence of events:
Saturday 3/29/08 purchase shoes
Monday 3/31/08 order shipped
Tuesday 4/1/08 actual shipping date
Friday 4/4/08 called to check on order
Monday 4/7/08 order delivered to WRONG address
Tuesday 4/8/08 me, livid, shoeless...

explanation:
i went to visit my sister the last weekend in March. while i was over there we went to Journey's and ordered some absolutely magnificent shoes but due to the fact that they didn't carry my size i ordered them and had them shipped to my work because i knew for sure someone would be here to sign for them. the chick at the checkout told me they would take 3-7 business days, not counting weekends, to get to me.
i called the store on Friday, the guy told me that they were shipped on 3/31/08 and that they "should be arriving any day now". i asked if there was a tracking number or something, to which he replied "nope, all we know is that they were shipped Monday."
so here it is, Tuesday, day 7 of the "3-7 business days, not counting weekends" and i am still shoeless. i'm pissed. i called the store AGAIN, this time a chick answered the phone. she asked for my name to look up the order, then asked me if i was sure it was that store that i had ordered them at. uh, yeah! so she looked it up and told me they were shipped on 4/1/08... i told her what the guy had said to me and she said "well, no, they were shipped on the first." i'm sorry, i was just telling you what he told me. she then said that she could give me a 1800-number to call. i told her that the guy i talked to Friday said that there was no number and no way i could track them... she said "well, there's only one guy that works here and he's a manager... i don't think he would have told you that." well tough beans chick! he did! and you're a wench!
she gave me the number, i called it, a British guy answered the phone and said that i had the wrong number, but gave me the right one, giving me the impression that this has happened before... apparently the idiot at Journey's had given me the wrong last 4 digits of the number. uh, hello?!
now i'm angry. i finally get a hold of UPS and the guy there, totally nice, finds my order no problem. he says he can give me an exact location with his GPS and tell me when it will be delivered. i calmed down a little. much to my dismay he says:
"uh... it looks like it was delivered on 4/7/08... yesterday..."
"well, i don't have them...??"
"uh-oh, looks like they were delivered to 12707 120th STREET, not 120th AVENUE... and it looks like they didn't even get the suite number on the delivery address"
"crap... i'm not even sure where that is"
"is 120th street a lot different than 120th avenue?"
"yeah, it is... dang it!"
"well, let me get a hold of the UPS store that delivered it and find out where it is for you, can you hold?"
"yeah. thanks"
*2 minutes later*
"ok, looks like they were left on the door step at 12707 120th STREET, but we can just put in a claim and retrieve your package and then re-route it to 12707 120th AVENUE. it will take a couple of days, but it will get to you, i promise."
"ok..."
"if for some reason it can't be retrieved you'll get your money back, we haven't been paid for this either..."
"ok. thanks so much"
"no problem, is there anything else i can do for you? i'm really sorry about this!!"
"nah, it's ok, thanks."
SO... now they have to find my shoes, hopefully beat the living crap out of the idiot that wrote down the wrong address and left my shoes on a doorstep, and re-route my shoes and i'll have them in a few days. he also said that he would give me a call when he got more information. he was nice. i'm a little less upset now...
rar.
i want my shoes!!!!

-kmw-

Friday, April 04, 2008

uh... someone's missing something...

hilarious.
i walked into the restroom at my work and on the floor inside the stall i found this...
no boys, it's not a bowl...
ladies... yes, yes it is. i found someones "padding" from their bra...
someones now walking around with something a little different on one side than the other...
the song "one of these kids is doin' her own thing" comes to mind...
i couldn't help but laugh right out loud.
i hope this brings a smile to a few faces...
it has certainly made my rainy-day a little brighter...
just another testament that they only do it for our entertainment...

-kmw-

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Lady!

i went out to visit my sister this past weekend...
my brother dropped me off at the ferry... i was booking it down the sidewalk with my duffel bag and big purse so i wouldn't miss the boat... turns out i didn't need to run, the one i needed to be on didn't come for another hour... ugh... figures.
i rode the ferry over and when i got there it was raining... oh yay. we went back to her place, and then went to the mall... which is when i purchased my beautiful shoes... and then watched movies and had dinner and just dorked around.
it was way fun!
their dog, Lady (pictured) is so big now!!
she woke me up Sunday morning about like the picture... with her nose in my face... what a doll... she laid in bed next to me for about an hour and then i got up and let her out.
Monday morning she didn't wake me up, but she was next to me when i woke up... this time she was asleep too... i guess that's what i get for sleeping on a mattress on the floor... :)
my sister, brother-in-law and i spent the weekend just kinda... doin whatever... it was a fun vacation for me :)
it's fun to spend time with my sister... we could sit for hours together and entertain each other... in fact, when i post my blogs, and i want them to be funny, i call her and read them aloud as i type them... for some reason that makes them more humorous and entertaining... we have lots of fun together... we laugh at the same things... the same ridiculous people... (they only do it for our entertainment!!)
cant wait til i getta go visit again!! :) i miss my Lady Girl!! oh, and my sister and brother-in-law too... hahaha

-kmw-

Reader's Digest

bored at work, reading all the "funnies" in the Reader's Digest

if the Lord wanted us to enjoy the sunrise, it would come no earlier than 10am.
--Gary L Eklund

a friend and i were listing all the disgusting foods we like to eat. i guess i won the contest because when i told her how much i enjoyed tongue, she shuddered.
"ewww," she said. "why would ou want to taste something that tastes you back?"
--Donna Eidinger

"we pick politicians by how they look on tv and Miss America on where she stands on the issues. isn't that a little backwards?"
--Jay Leno

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

addicted...

(n) condition of being habitually or compulsively occupied with or involved

i'm pretty sure that those of you that know me are aware that i have an addiction.
ever since the first episode of CSI i saw i've been hooked.
i was a shoe-in to be a crime-solving-tv-show-aholic.
the list of shows i'm currently addicted to is here, in no particular order:
CSI
CSI: Miami
CSI: NY
Cold Case
Without A Trace
Shark
NCIS
The Unit
Criminal Minds
it gets so bad... i put my phone on silent, i wont respond to text messages unless it's a commercial, i wont let people talk during the show...
and i'm pissed when people die or get buried alive (nick from csi... season 5... i totally cried...)
and especially when they leave it as a cliff-hanger ending to an episode or season...
the worst 3 words in the world...
"to be continued"
i've gotten attached to the characters...
they're like my tv-family...
i have to be in on what's going on between them... love it.
this week is all new episodes!!
the writer's strike is over! :)

-kmw-

by request: show times...
Sunday:
Cold Case(9pm)
Shark(10pm)

Monday:
CSI: Miami(9pm)

Tuesday:
NCIS(8pm)
The Unit(9pm)

Wednesday:
Criminal Minds(9pm)
CSI: NY(10pm)

Thursday:
CSI(9pm)
Without a Trace(10pm)

yes i'm a big nerd and i linked all of them to their own sites...